And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
-Anais Nin

Here is where our story begins. This is Sophie aka Osama Bin Doggie…sweet lovable little terrorist. A barker, guardian of our home just ring the doorbell and you will understand. We love her and she loves us. She has arthritis in her lower spine and right after Xmas we noticed she was walking differently slipping and falling all over the place (we have hardwood floors, acres of them) in short she needed to be checked out and it was time for the po po check (you know stick up the rear) and her annual shots. So off to the vet we go. She agreed to go only because she knows we will drop by Dairy Queen and she gets an ice cream if she doesn’t bite anyone!

Enter the Vet:

Sophie: “Why do they always put me in THIS room? There are CAT pictures on every wall!”
“I want to bite you but they slapped a muzzle on me.”

Me (thinking) Thank God they put a muzzle on her, they really remember her…I wonder how long it took the vet techs wounds to heal from last year.

Sophie: “I see those shots on the counter and that $%^&* stick. I’m going to give them the poor pitiful shaking and sad eyes. “

Me: “Hi doctor S did you have a nice holiday” If I’m nice to her maybe she won’t hate my dog.

Dr. “Good morning Sophie, Yes we had a great holiday!” Remember you are a doctor and love all doggies…. “Lets take a look at her spine and watch her walk…”

Sophie: “Why are they putting me on the floor…oh I gotta go get weighed..I hope she knows I gained a few lbs during the holidays…I hate this part too…so embarrassing…”

Me: So far so good…ooops she just peed on the floor…it’s okay its a vets office dogs and cats do that all the time here right?

Doctor and Sophie and vet tech return from their walk to the scales. Back on the table goes Sophie/Osama

Sophie: “Damn”

Me: So what do you think about her back and hip problems?

Dr: “Doesn’t look good and the options are limited.” Doctor proceeds with more examination, poking and twisting..

Sophie: “I’m gonna cry a bit and see if she will lay off my hips”

Dr. “Well we could try her on Prednazone but because of her “unique” personality it could be problematic”

Me: She is telling me my sweet doggie is a jerk!!!

Dr.: “We can do some tests, Xrays and such but if she needs surgery I don’t think she would handle that well either.”

Me: She really thinks Sophie is an ass!

Dr. “I don’t know… there aren’t many options.”

Me: “Are you telling me it is time to say goodbye (tears are welling up)”

Dr. “It is your decision”

Dr. “If you decide to do this (she is referring to…you know..bye bye) there are things you will need to consider”
.
Me: “Consider?” she wants me to say good bye to the sweetest dog that ever lived!

Sophie: “Can we get on with this please!” “They sure are chatting it up today”

Dr: “Do you want to be with her, do you want to bury her in your back yard, cremation, burial plot..” and she hands me a pamphlet for a pet cemetery.

Me: now I’m beginning to hyperventilate..”I’m not ready for this decision now” (I really hate you I may bite you myself)

Dr. “Ok well lets try her on a muscle relaxer and see if that doesn’t keep her more comfortable until you have time to think about this.”

Sophie: “I’ll give you a muscle relaxer if you will take of this %^&* muzzle”

Me: Sobbing

Dr.” Lets not give her the shots and regular tests today.”

Me: sure why should we give her a rabbies shot if we are going to murder her tomorrow.
Sophie and I leave

Sophie: “Wow that wasn’t so bad no po po check…no shots…just a weigh in and I’m outta here” “Can we go to Dairy Queen now?” “Why is mom crying, she can get some ice cream too!”

I call Sir Quilt Dude he can hardly understand me because I’m crying so hard…he calls the doctor…the doctor talks to the head doctor. They decided to do exrays and blood work. In the mean time I’m giving Sophie treats and muscle relaxers. I’m taking Sophie’s muscle relaxers and drinking wine..and crying every time I look at her..

Sophie goes back to the vet for the tests the next day.

Sophie: “Crap I know I’m getting the works now!” “Here comes the muzzle”

Sophie comes home and sleeps it off meds they gave her to do the ex rays and such..the vet calls (the head vet) and they are going to try some non steroidal stuff and see if it helps WE ARE NOT GOING TO OFF HER…AT LEAST FOR 30 DAYS…

Sophie within 24 hours: “Wow I feel great, I’m going to chase those squirrels out of my yard” “BETTER LIVING THROUGH PHARMACEUTICALS.”and they thought I was ready for the eternal dirt nap… FOOLED THEM! I AM SOPHIE THE GREAT…SOPHIE THE WONDER DOG…OSAMA BIN DOGGIE (sometimes).”

Me:
“Ok we will spend whatever it costs to keep her comfortable and alive…”

Sir Quilt Dude: This is gonna cost me…for sure….