Trip to the Low Country part 1.

But Officer, I’ve Never Gotten and Ticket Before and I’m a Quilter and a Grandmother!
-Pat Wys March 17th 2012

Here is my story and I’m stickin to it! Upon leaving the Low Country of Beaufort SC our hostesses were telling Debbie and I not to go home the way we came. Why? Well Savannah is one of the worlds largest St. Patrick’s Day party towns. They die the river green and apparently there is a lot of booze , merriment. (I didn’t want any details about it because my youngest daughter and her friends decided to go to Savannah for the historic ambiances and enjoy spring in the South or so I was told. Please leave me to my delusions okay!)Back to our story..We were given terrific directions by our hostesses and told to watch our speed because there are speed traps. OK..no problem! Also, the drive was, as they said…beautiful and we would pass a church that was partially burned by that scoundrel Sherman as he made his March to the sea during the Civil War.  

They weren’t kidding about the drive..it was so beautiful. The Live Oak Trees and Spanish Moss was amazing, so southern, so low country. (insert.. Gone with the Wind music here.)

This is where our story turns ugly. We both saw a sign that said 55mph. Ok so I’m chuggin along. Then came the blue lights. OH MY! Here is the dialog. 

Me: “Hello officer” (with a bright shinny smile, I had on my pearl earrings and my lace jacket!) 
Officer: (a very large and imposing man…very large..kinda scary) “You were going 53 mph in a 35 mph zone” (gruff, I’m refraining from typing the way he pronounced and enunciated his words nuff said)
Me: “I didn’t see the signs, the last sign I saw was 55mph” (chin quiver but keeping my composure) “I’ve never been on this road”
Officer: “That is part of the problem.” (alrighty then, my blood was starting to boil)
Debbie thinking…hold it together girl don’t get the smart mouth..we don’t want to go to jail in this town, those pearl earrings are gonna get you no where!
Me: “What do I need to give you, here is my license?” 
Officer: “License and registration” Debbie was already digging in the glove box.
Me:  okay let’s play the stupid card   “Is this it officer?” (insert batting eye lashes)
Officer:  “Yes, how do you pronounce your name” 
Me: ” Weeees” (thinking…if you are going to give me a ticket I’m not going to help you with my name…BOZO!)
Debbie: thinking…she’s gonna blow and I’m GOING to go to jail!!!!!

Officer goes back to car for what seemed like 45 minutes. Debbie and I were chatting about what this was going to cost me…not good.
Officer returns..
Officer: “Mama I’m going to cut you a break and I don’t normally do that I’m going to reduce your speed to 39 mph. The ticket normally would have cost you $329.00 now it will cost you $82.00. 
 Me: “Thank You officer, I’m a QUILTER AND A GRANDMOTHER AND I am very careful!” 
Debbie..did she just say what I thought she said!?!
We follow the officer to a little dirt driveway and he pulls out ahead of us going left. A car was coming toward him…and he flipped on the blue lights and PULLED THE CAR OVER!!!!! He was maybe 100 yards down the road from where we were pulling out!!!! I waved as we drove by. Debbie, laughing her head off  “Did you just wave to him!!!”

As Deb and I were CREEPING DOWN THE ROAD watching every sign the we saw a sign that said 55mph (I went 25 and people in back of me were passing me like crazy…whatever!), within 100 or so feet was a 45mph and then another 100 feet it dropped to 35mph…I true speed trap for sure!!!! 

So then our drive continued through what is called the Savannah River Site. 

Now this 17 mile drive was nothing but trees and road…we saw nothing except signs..BIG signs that said:

55mph Strictly Enforced
Emergency Stopping ONLY 
NO STANDING

What the HELL does that mean..You better not drive slower than 55mph or you are in trouble, and if you have an Emergency you better not get out of that car or you will have a Stealth Bomber on you in 2.5 seconds! We lost our GPS reception the whole way..
As soon as we exited the site area the speed limit dropped like a rock to 40mph. 

We told called our husbands and told them we no longer needed night lights cuz our hair would glow in the dark. 

If anyone would like to travel with me in the future…it is always an adventure. I’m taking applications!

More on the trip and Beaufort SC tomorrow. I gotta go write the check for my ticket…..