Mistakes and Mishaps

You grow up the day you have your first real laugh – at yourself.

Ethel Barrymore

Our story begins…..

Chapter 1

We were having our house painted, hired a super painter. It took him 2 weeks to paint the house and we have an all brick house! I think he painted all the trim with an eyeliner brush. He did such a good job, so good that I didn’t pay much attention to what he was doing..or the color of the metal roofs, garage inserts and front door. (which was carefully chosen by ME) Dashing out of the house to go get some fresh shrimp for dinner I looked at the house and thought, I don’t like that color on the garage doors. Got home, and sat in my car in the cul-de-sac and decided I hated the color…I SERIOUSLY HATED IT! It was lavender!!! The tin roofs were a very dark shade of the garage door, purple undertones. I about had a heart attack. Told the painter it was going to have to have a repaint. At this point I think if he had a gun I would be a dead woman. It is 100 degrees out there!! I told him I would call my husband after I unloaded the groceries. Suzanne was here and she agreed with me about the paint.  While getting bags out of my car I was walking across the garage, slipped, fell and I’m fairly sure I did a triple flip in the air. SWELL! Thank goodness Suzanne was there to rescue me. I went in the house and called the Wallet, (husband). In his usual calm cool manner…he said his first concern was that I was ok. “Sure I’m fine! It just hurts, kinda everywhere”. Then he tells me to do whatever I have to do to make the house and me a happy. $400 dollars later we are all spiffy and shiny! Best house on the block.

Chapter 2 (later that same evening)

Our saga continues. See this.

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This is 2400 BTU’s of glorious gas burner. When one is busy sewing AND boiling shrimp one should pay very close attention to what is going on in the kitchen. The giant pot full of shrimp was in full rolling boil, overdrive so to speak. It was a mess. The chef (that would be moi) moves the pot off the burner (did I mention the 2400 BTU’s) and proceeds to slosh boiling water while standing next to the burner which was still ON full blast. The result, a burned tummy. Bad. Pain. Bikini season is ruined for me.

Chapter 3

After the trauma of the paint, gymnastics in the garage and the cooking of the shrimp I feel like I have gone 3 rounds with Sugar Ray Lennard and then got battered dipped and fried by Paula Deen (perhaps this is not the best time to mention Ms. Dean). I have decided my best place is safely working with a needle in hand, but the way I’m going I will poke my eye out. I’ll pass on the rotary cutter for a day or so,  I’m not to be trusted right now. 

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